The One and Onliest

“Bones” Musings: Anyone else feel sort of bad for the club owner in “Wannabe in the Weeds”?

Sure, he’s sort of an asshole, because he and his friend fooled a lot of gullible people into believing that they had a shot at actual fame. But, you know, if you really believe you’re going to become famous from singing in a seedy lounge in the outskirts of Maryland or Virginia or whatever, maybe you deserve to be fooled. But consider what this dude went through in a matter of weeks:

• His place was closed due to food poisoning. This would be enough to destroy any business. Also, who serves honey as bar food? Maybe this guy deserved getting closed down for a week or two, in that respect, fine, sure.
• But then one of his best customers is murdered. And yeah, said customer was a crappy singer with an inflated ego, but he still seemed to bring some trade in, even if they were asshole coworkers from his gym.
• His scam (the aforementioned one, making his customers at amateur hour believe that his pal was an actual agent) was discovered by one FBI Special Agent Seeley Booth. Not only does he have to stop said scam, but he’s also a suspect for said best customer’s murder. Life sucks for this dude, bro.
• But wait, there’s more. The whole murder mystery is settled, Club Owner wasn’t involved in the least, and hey, Special Agent Seeley Booth apparently doesn’t hold enough of a grudge to not frequent his business by bringing everyone he knows over to hear his one true love partner cover Cyndi Lauper! Everything’s coming up roses again! There’s a light at the end of the tunnel.
• Then Special Agent Seeley Booth is apparently shot and killed by some random lunatic. And then Some Random Lunatic is shot and killed in return. All in this dude’s bar. And all this had absolutely nothing to do with him. It turns out this place is just, like, the Bermuda Triangle of piano bars or something.
• You don’t come back after a thing like this happens. Food poisoning? It’s unfortunate, but it happens. The murder of a regular at your business is also unfortunate, and kind of spooky, but again, nothing to do with you—and it might just bring in some morbid customers  (who might replace the ones who are upset that you scammed them). But having a gun battle in the middle of your bar that leaves two people dead? It just doesn’t sound good. You know what kind of establishment’s reputation is benefited when people are killed inside of them? Haunted houses. That’s it.
• So when I watch the episode, sure, I immediately feel bad for Booth (even though it turns out he didn’t die after all), and Brennan (because ugh, poor Brennan), and even the squints because watching your friend get shot in the chest can’t be very pleasant. But also kind of feel bad for the club owner. Because seriously?

At that very moment, that guy’s trying to figure out how much it would cost to get blood stains out of the carpet, and how quickly he can file for chapter eleven, and if his sister out in Scranton has a couch he can sleep on for the next few years.

Poor dude.